happy birthday rainer! [blog catchup] (195/365b)

called rainer in thailand before the kids left for school to wish him a happy birthday. i figured out it was actually a pretty nice time of day to do skype calling to thailand. usually by the time the kids are home it's too late there.

i'm nervous about playing in front of a committee today, deciding the program for the upcoming concert of music by Herzogenberg. I'm only nervous because one of the people on the committee is also on the committee of my upcoming audition for an orchestra, and for some reason i am worried that what i do today will affect what happens then. i didn't really prepare that much for this because honestly, whatever they decide to put on the program i'll practice properly for then. but a few days ago i signed up for the other audition, and they also published a list of people on the jury for today, and now i'm nervous. i told all my fears to nina this morning with coffee. i'm still nervous and also a bit shaky. theodore and i went together to the conservatory, he has a mini-strings rehearsal and i was warming up for the jury people.

while i played my nose ran and ran and i really wanted to cough the whole time. but really? it was fine.

a close visual approximation to how i'm feeling right now.
blaaaaaaaaah